Trapped – October Blog Hop

I am participating in a blog hop with some writer friends of mine. We have each written a Halloween/seasonal short story (under 1,000 words). Below is my story, followed by a link to each participants’ story. Enjoy!


Darkness surrounds me, but it’s not enough. I crouch behind the only item that can shield me from the sight of the approaching terror. I hear my heart pound and am certain the evil beast coming my direction can hear it too. Or soon would; in only seconds she – it – would be upon me.

Never have I seen such a horrible looking creature. The freak heading my direction would make Frankenstein’s bride look attractive. The only relief from her spotted face is the ratted hair that dangles in front. She swipes it aside and I want to turn away, yet can’t help but watch the train wreck that is this living being.

Her nose is the largest I have ever seen. The eyes glow and her left eye, I swear, is lower than the right. There is too much hair to see her ears, if she has any.

Her chin points out like a ski jump. She has an adam’s apple that would make any manly man proud. She snorts. I don’t know at what and I don’t care. The snort reminds me of a feeding pig and I instantly picture myself being devoured.

She lumbers straight towards me. If I run she’ll see me. Is there any chance she won’t notice me cowering for my life? I don’t see how.

I can’t stand to look upon it for another moment. I turn to look away and that’s when I notice the smell – the smell of death itself. How did I miss it before? I try to hold my breath, but as fear courses through my body my breathing increases and I suck in more of the putrid odor. I think I’m going to gag. Something in my throat fights to escape and it’s all I can do to keep from coughing. Any noise would be the end of me.

The shuffling of footsteps grows louder. She is close enough now I can hear her deep, heavy breaths. Simply walking seems to be a chore for this large, overweight demon.

It is the moment of truth. I duck my head between my knees and cover it with my arms as if I am now invisible. Will it – she – see me? Why am I here? Am I about to die? Or worse? So many questions surge through my mind in the mere seconds I have left.

I say a quick prayer; tell God I will be a better person and won’t even lie that I just peed my pants a little.

I hold my breath and fight off tears. Time drags until I realize I am alone and can safely exhale. How did I go unnoticed? Is she blind? Maybe I made myself invisible. Or maybe God answered my prayer? Whatever it was I am thankful.

I rise from my hiding spot and go to find Jeffery. He was right. His sister is a monster.


Benjamin Thomas Autumn Cascade
Crystal Collier Emily’s Ghost
Viola Fury 911
Juneta Key (placeholder)
C. Lee McKenzie Beautiful
Erica Damon Penance’
J. Q. Rose Sorry
Elise VanCise Lady In The Woods
Barbara Lund Spooky Space
Angela Wooldridge Quiet Neighbours
Katharina Gerlach Australian Dream
Karen Lynn The Waves at Midnight
Sherri Conway Ants
Elizabeth McCleary Over James Henry Wilcox Dead Body
Canis Lupus The Picture
Peg Fisher All In the Fall, a Fractured Fairytale

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21 Responses to Trapped – October Blog Hop

  1. Pingback: Shiny People (Storytime Blog Hop) – JUNETA KEY

  2. Perfect twist! Absolutely loved it. 🙂

  3. Karen Lynn says:

    Very good description of the monster! I really wasn’t expecting that ending. This would make a good beginning to something bigger.

  4. J.Q. Rose says:

    Great choice of words to build your scary monster. Loved the ending. LOL

  5. Ha, unexpected ending! Nice one 🙂

  6. Great tension and a wonderfully funny twist at the end. Happy Halloween.

  7. Juneta says:

    LOL, Here I was expecting something else and it is boys being boys. Good Job. Fun story.
    Juneta @ Writer’s Gambit

  8. ViolaFury says:

    Great imagery and ending!

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  10. lol
    Boys …
    I loved it. It’s a really funny story.

  11. Pingback: The Waves At Midnight | Reprobate Typewriter

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